If you know me in the 'real-world'... Keep it to yourself.

Do NOT tell my friends and family about this blog!

This blog is a work in progress. Eventually, when it grows up, it wants to look pretty. Or maybe dark and dangerous.

Hmm... well come back later and see for yourself...

If you want to contact me but are a) too chicken to leave a public comment and
b) too lazy to look up my email address from my profile
use the form below.

Email Address:

Tuesday, February 28, 2006


It's carnival time again. On Saturday the floats were in Panjim and panjimites got to experience traffic chaos like never before. Near the St. Inez Church traffic was so bad that it took my dad 45 mins to travel a distance of about 100 mts. Lucky he didn't see me riding my bike along the sidewalks in that area :D It was something I've always wanted to do and I've never had an occasion that called for it. Well that day I was low on petrol n patience... a dangerous combo.

Sunday the parade was in Margao. My cousin was on a float but I didn't see that float at all. I haven't seen a proper parade the last 2 yrs. Its lost is allure for me. Maybe next yr I'll do it properly. I'll find a nice spot near the secretariat and I'll make sure no float escapes my eagle eye. [I actually have 2 very poor eyes but what the heck...]

Relationships update

Couple A - No news. I've not contacted Miss A recently. Not had the time. And since I enjoy speaking to her once I start, I try not to call up unless I have lots of time to spare and my conscience is clear about how much I'm costing my folks.

Couple B - Everything that could go wrong apparently did go wrong when the folks met. His mom is totally against the girl's family now. She says there's no way she'll accept her. He says he's going to say its either her or it's no one. The girl is miserable... She can't talk to anyone. She feels if her folks realise that his folks are so against it, then her folks will also decide against the relationship n if it ever reaches that stage honestly don't know if either of them is strong enough to go through with it just based on their feelings for each other.

Couple C - Don't know anything. Thank God! It upsets me too much and right now I'm too busy getting upset by couple B. I'm going to assume that since I've not heard anything too bad, they're struggling onwards.

Sunday, February 19, 2006


Three different couples I know are at three very different stages in their relationships.

Couple A - The girl is my friend. The guy is an asshole :)... I know thats biased... well this is my world ... so guess who rules. She wants to move deeper into a relationship. He's trying to run for his life. The more he runs the more dependent she's becoming. Ordinarily I'd tell her to stick it out... but this guy is really an asshole. He's not a clean heart. He's an ordinary guy. She deserves better. She's my friend.

Couple B - Both are my friends. Both were totally uninterested in marriage some time back. Now both are actively considering it. The guy more so. The girl is trying not to invest too much of herself in the relationship just in case it doesn't work out. Well, they are both from traditional families so tomorrow his folks will meet her and her family. If all goes well she can stop guarding her heart and allow herself to be as enthusiastic about it as he seems to be.

Couple C - Here also, both are my friends. This is very painful for me. How horrible it is for both of them I can only imagine. The guy is acting like a typical heavy handed romeo... determined to put her in the wrong... Is it something that guys have programmed in their brains... how to be a jerk.
I'm not saying she's handlin' it in a gr8 way.... though maybe she is. She has an immense capacity to literally forget all the hurtful things he says to her. She's hurt and confused but if he was nice tomorrow I really believe she could move on happily. He's a different story. He's carrying this immense grudge inside him. Every step of the way he's lashing out and punishing her. Should I interfere n tell him what I think of him. What if I just make it worse. If I interfere n they break up b'cos of me... will it really be for the best as I'm coming to believe. I'm really fond of her. I wouldn't want her to ever feel that I did it cos I once liked him cos that's so not the case. I'm not feeling very predisposed towards him at the moment. What if I make him feel like I'm not his friend anymore. Then if they do end he might feel abandoned by everyone. I don't much care at the moment but I don't want him sliding back into the dope den he's crawled out off.