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This blog is a work in progress. Eventually, when it grows up, it wants to look pretty. Or maybe dark and dangerous.

Hmm... well come back later and see for yourself...

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Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Locked In!

Excitement in the colony on Sunday .

The colony has some kind of association which has meeting every now n then which no one bothers to attend. Well that's besides some old foggies. On Sunday they met and passed a resolution saying that no 'bachelors' (thats what they call all single people) should be allowed to stay in the colony. Bullshit. I got a notice telling me I have to leave by the end of the week. I called the owner up and she told me not to worry. A group of 5 or 6 old men can't decide for the full colony. According to her most of the people in the colony have given their flats out on rent and they prefer giving it to single people since they're easier to get rid off. Hmmm..

Well I was sitting at home peaceful as could be. Called a friend over for dinner. About 20 minutes later I got a call from her asking me where I was. I told her I was at home waiting for her. She said “Well if you're at home why is your door latched from the the outside?!?” She was calling from right outside my front door! Apparently someone had latched the door from outside. Well it was lucky for me that she came along otherwise I wouldn't have known anything till the next afternoon and then it would have been hard to find someone to unlatch the door.

I'm going to remove that latch today. They might have a padlock next time!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Last Chapter

This is the final story in the set. The first three can be found by clicking on the 'Fiction' link on the left.

The only thing they have in common is my mood when I wrote them...


Last Chapter

This was the last chapter in the book. Ricky was determined to make it out alive. When they’d started out he’d been an insignificant character. But then the murders had started. And the characters had started to die, one by one. One or two in each chapter. But he’d made it. And he was determined to survive till the end. AND… he was also determined to be the guy that got the girl.

He frowned. Unless of course she turned out to be the murderess. No one else seemed to have noticed, but he’d had his eye on her right from the start and there were quite a few small indications here and there. Of course, at first his eye had been on her just because she was the most beautiful description around. Long silky hair, soulful eyes, a figure to die for… He sighed and tried not to get too engrossed in his dreams. That was the best way to get murdered around here. Be caught unawares and get a knife in your back.

He wandered out of the house. He’d just got a minor mention so far. The thought started worrying him. Maybe that was a warning. Maybe the next thing he knew he’d be found lying on the ground, dead.

He frowned. That didn’t seem right. How the hell would he know if he was dead?

He found his feet taking him towards the rose garden and brightened up immediately. SHE spent a lot of her time in the rose garden. That would be fun. He hoped the author would write the scene that followed. It was no fun being left untold. He couldn’t experience so many things because the author was trying to cater to a family audience.

If only he’d been a character in a porn book. Now that would be a rich field of experience.


Damn. Last he’d been walking towards the rose garden and HER. And now here he was back in his room. With her lipstick all over his shirt! A huge smile broke across his face. Apparently he’d finally gotten some action; but why oh why didn’t the author write it? Atleast he’d have had a memory to last him by even if he didn't wind up with her.

He showered and dressed, the smile still on his face. He was so engrossed in his thoughts he hardly heard the Butler knocking on the door. He went and opened the door and found that he was being summoned to a meeting downstairs. He hurried downstairs eagerly. New developments. Who was the new victim?

Downstairs the blue sitting room was full. The inspector had gathered together all the characters and the private investigator was about to launch into the denouement. Ricky shivered with anticipation, apparently he'd made it to the climax. He was standing at the end of the room. Not important enough to join the main characters up in front. But he was still happy just to be there. And then, before he could really start to enjoy himself, he heard the detective say that the Girl was missing. He felt a cold finger run down his spine. He'd been on his way to meet her. He'd woken up with her lipstick all over his shirt. The shirt that was still lying unwashed in the bathroom upstairs. What if this wasn't the climax after all. What if this was an attempt to mislead the readers. What if he was arrested and had to sit out the rest of the book in a prison cell until the real killer was captured... His worry for the Girl receded into the background as he started worrying about himself.

Then an even more horrifying thought struck him. What if he was actually the murderer. What if this book didn't have any scenes from the killers point of view, and the poor chap was going merrily about his life without realising what the author was making him do 'off-stage' so to speak. Ricky broke out into a cold sweat. He mustered up the courage to look directly at the detective and found that the detective was grazing steadily at him.

Panic stricken he muttered an excuse to the footman standing next to him and edged out of the room. He found himself hurrying upstairs, for the first time feeling like the helpless pawn that he was. He muttered angrily to himself, there was no point trying to flee. Only the killer would flee. He'd take that shirt and go down and talk to that detective. He'd tell him everything he'd observed and offer to help. A smile crept over his face. Maybe he'd become a major character now. If he actually did a real good job of it he might even be promoted to sidekick to the famous detective. He'd noticed that this detective was still working alone. Well it was only the second book of the series. It was the right time for introduction of a sidekick. He rushed to the bathroom and picked up the shirt from the laundry basket. As he straightened up he looked into the mirror in front of him just in time to see the knife come swooping down.

His last emotion was annoyance. Now he'd never know who the killer was...

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Hot Gossip at the Call Centre...

Long time since I've written here... Lets see, last time I told you a little about my colony. This week I'll tell you a little about work or rather the people I meet at work. Their hopes, dreams, romances,...

I work in a call centre. My shift timings change now n then. Work is ok. Deadly dull though. Selling vehicle insurance for an UK company. It's an inbound process. That means that we don't have to call up people. We just sell insurance to people who call us up for quotes. Everyone says inbound is very easy. Only people who are interested in the product will call up obviously. They say that out bound is terrible because you have to call up strange people and try to sell them stuff. Well all I have to say is that the outbound people are paid much more as incentives too. Anyway enough about work.

The workplace is pretty exciting right now. One of the guys in my batch is pretty good friends with one of the team leads on the floor so he gets to know all the hot gossip, even about the more senior executives. Some of the things he tells me are so shocking I'm not sure whether to believe him, but so far everything he's told me has turned out to be true, so I always listen eagerly. I call him my 'source'. He told me that our ops manager was having an affair with the manager of another process. I found that hard to believe. I mean they were both married and besides his wife was a sweet girl. When I first heard about it I thought it was just some spiteful gossip but then I saw them having cozy dinners more than once at various posh restaurants around town and once when they were leaving I saw that he'd his arm around her... I felt very sorry for his wife. Though for all you know she has someone on the side as well. This town is such a dirty place. Anyway all this is old news. That guy and his wife moved away, the “other woman” is still here though. I heard she'd divorced her husband. Right now she's single as far as I know though I can tell that many of the older men In the office seem to think they have a shot with her. Creeps.

Here I am babbling about old news when I've got some really hot news. Apparently AJU and Upen have broken up again. Ok I know I haven't introduced them yet but I'm sooo excited. AJU stands for Angelina Jolie Understudy. Cos that's what she thinks she looks like and thats what she tries for. She fails miserably of course, though roadside romeos would probably find her attractive enough. Anyway, her on again, off again, boyfriend is a fitting match for her. He's Upen Patel to the power of 20. Oily, smirking, feeling-girls-up creep. New girls who don't know any better find him attractive but then they learn. Funny thing is he never learns. He still thinks he's a stud. And since someone told him he's called Upen behind his back he's started strutting around like it's a compliment!

Well to get back to the story, recently a new girl has joined us on the floor. Little miss indecently short skirt, MISS for short. Well the moment Upen saw Miss he had only one thing on his mind. He's been hanging about with his tongue out for weeks now. Well apparently MISS made the mistake of going out with him. There was a huge row yesterday. AJU was crying and whining and Upen was acting all high and mighty. It started in the cafetaria but then he stalked out and she followed him so we didn't get to hear all the juicy details. But my 'source' told me that AJU found some messages on his cell from or to MISS. She blew up. Obviously she was expecting him to say sorry. But she reckoned without Upen's ego. He thinks women are secondary citizens put on earth for his pleasure. Last seen she was crying and he was ignoring her.

Anyway, time I got back on the floor. Still have so much to tell you guys...Catch ya later...

Thursday, January 08, 2009

HSBC Credit Card - Part Two

Just a quick post to say that after a daily exchange of emails, (apparently sending an email full of expletives and threats of legal action works!) I got an email from HSBC today as follows:

We refer to your email message dated 06 January 2008 regarding your
credit card.

Regarding your query relating to annual fee, a Lifetime Free Credit card
would depend on the corporate tie up between HSBC and different

However, as a service gesture we have reversed the annual fee for INR
3000/- along with the service tax and the relevant credit will reflect
in the subsequent month statement.

We value your custom and request you to reconsider your decision to
cancel the card.

Please feel free to write to us if you require further clarification.

Yours sincerely,

Customer Service Executive
HSBC India


  • At which point I thanked them for the favour they seem to think they are doing me.
  • Pointed out that if I hadn't checked my statement I'd have been 3000 poorer like their other hapless customers
  • Asked how the hell I could return their cards and how long it would take.
And now I'm sure HSBC things everything's settled.

Yeah right! Their prompt action has taken them off the top spot on my hit list but they're there to stay...

Monday, January 05, 2009

HSBC Credit Card - Part One

This is something I've got to share...

The sad saga started more than a year back. Some guy walked into our office and asked if we wanted LIFETIME FREE HSBC Credit Cards. I wasn't too keen but since everyone was applying for one I did too and soon I was the owner of a LIFETIME FREE HSBC Card. [The capitals are there for a reason.... read on]

I received a call even before I got the card saying that I would also receive a free add on card. I specifically said I DID NOT want an add on card. I mean, what would one of me do with 2 cards?

The person on the phone said okay, the add on card would be cancelled and yet after some time I found that 2 cards were delivered. I should have figured out how attention deficit they were right then. I would have refused the second card but I wasn't sure that it would be a good idea to leave the card with the delivery guy!

Anyway, I have no idea where the post office is so I never did send that card back. Why the hell should I have to pay and take trouble for their asininity.


Fast forward a few months. I used the card a couple of times but found that it was a big hassle paying the dues. The card statements would come almost on the due date and then I'd have to scurry all the way to town since they didn't have any branches nearby. They also didn't have any cheque pick up facility... c'mon, how antiquated are they?!?

Anyway one time I was 1 day late with one payment. I was actually standing in their atm but could not pay since I didn't have my atm pin. So I'm on the phone with their customer executive and he's telling me there's nothing he can do to help me. Then the talk somehow turned to the fact that the card was a free card. I had this warning chill down my spine. I asked him point blank if I would have to suddenly pay something for the card. He asked when the expiry was I said towards the end of 2009. He said I might have to pay some charges then. I told him I didn't need a card and I'd sooner cancel it than choose to renew it.

Anyway, after that I got fed up with traipsing all over town to pay my dues so I paid them all off. In fact I paid about 172 bucks extra, and then I promptly forgot all about the damn thing.

Today I checked my email.. (thank you God)... and I found that they'd sent me a credit card statement. I opened it, something I'd ordinarily never do.... I mean why would I open a credit card statement for a card I haven't used for months. A card moreover where I have paid EXTRA!!!

But I opened the statement expecting to see what I'd seen last time... the pleasing sight of money owed to me by a credit card company.... BUT.... you know what's coming up right....
apparently I owed them 3000 bucks!!!!

I was shocked. My card was right in front of me. Had someone managed to get it out of my purse without my knowledge...

I frantically checked the details, only to find that they were as follows:

Membership fees - Rs. 2000
Add - on fees - Rs. 1000

I was furious at first. I called up their customer care line intending to rant and rave, but some poor SOB was lucky the damn thing was closed.

So I vented out my ire in an email.

Then I checked online and apparently this is a common scam of theirs. Promising "LIFETIME FREE" cards and then very quietly adding membership fees.

Now I feel it's my duty to see that someone who can't afford it doesn't become a victim.

So now... here I am... with a brand new 'new year' resolution... SCREW HSBC

Now I don't want their card or anything from them even if they paid me.

I'm strongly tempted to make a voodoo doll called HSBC and stick pins into it.